Smoke-less in Marion 

Smoke-less in Marion

Day two of having no cigarettes...

I hate having to bum smokes off my boyfriend and Ken, it makes me feel so...poor. I mean well...I know I ain't the richest person in town but when it comes to me bumming stuff, boy does it show me that I am poor as hell. I mean here I am 18 years old no money, no job and practically no life of my own.

Well anyways, on Sunday my friend Takato graduated from high school which is more than I can say for myself. What the fuck was I doing listening to people? "Drop out" they said, "You have so much more potential" they told me. Yeah well where are they now? It makes me even more mad to know I listened to them in the first god damn place. Even Chris Smith graduated for christ's sake! He was the stoner, beer drinking dumbfuck of the class! Now I see I am the dumbfuck...

After that I went to Takato's grad party which was awesome, I ended up asleep on the floor for some reason though. Could be the 20 minutes of sleep I had gotten from Saturday to Sunday maybe? Nah...

On Monday...went to Tai's for the day and was with him and Ken for the day. I don't know why but I talked like a fucking dumbass once again...maybe cigarettes are my intelligence factor? With cigarettes I ain't a total dumbass but without them I am too busy pining for them to act like someone worth listening to.

Anyways, I gotta think quick before four...how to get smokes. I don't want to beg again for one...I don't like it and don't want to do it...but I know I will if I can't think of anything else. In other words, when I ask for help on something...means I am fucked everywhere else.